April 1, 1989
Mr Seymour S. Sisskind
1456 Ocean Avenue
Santa Monica, CA 90401
Dear Mr Sisskind,
Island of Friki
Greece
Re your reservation of June 15 to June 30, one dbl. rm. with bath and half-board and your letter of March 15 which is only reaching us now because there is a long strike in the post office and there is a big behind in the mail. I am noting that you are canceling your reservations because you are reading in the Los Angeles Times that there is going to be a general election in Greece on June 18 and you are afraid you will be catclysmed by “political upheavals, riots, civil disturbances and acts of God” which your travel insurance is covering but, never mind, you and the graceful Mrs Sisskind do not want to get mixed in.
Dear Mr Sisskind, I am most regretted that you are wanting to cancel your reservation for the second time in two years and I must assure you that you are making a large mistake because we are not a barbaric country that is upheaving and disturbing the civilians when we are doing elections. For m&ny years now the soldier who is standing outside the voting stations with his cranium and his army rifle is never having the necessity of shooting anybody and everything is conducted with calmness and tranquility and you will not be “hit in the head by a rock” as you say with disquietedness in your letter.
Sometimes the counting of votes is not very correct and there is rape and adultery of the results but that was many years ago in 1962 when·the father of Mr Papandreou accused Mr Karamanlis of this bad thing. Now, the father of Mr Papandreou is dead and Mr Karamanlis is not politicising himself anymore because he says Greece is one big insane asylum , but this is not true, Mr Sisskind, anyway not in Friki.
So you must not be afraid that any ad will occur to you even if we are doing elections. Of course, like every country in Europe, we have strikes of the banks, post office, the telephones, the electric company, the civilian servants, the buses, the taxis and Olympic Airways but the only other manifestations are peaceful demonstrations with people walking slowly up Stadiou Sreet in Athens with banners and houting signals. Sometimes there are narchists who break the front windows of the shops but the tourists always remain intact.
Anyway, as I am reading in your letter you will be spending one night only in Athens at the Grande Bretagne and that is a very quiet hotel with no noise except from the traffic outside and the pianist in the bar. If on the night you are staying there will a political concentration in Syndagma Square with speeches from the balcony by Mr Papandreou, or Mr Mitsotakis, or Mr Florakis, there will be some noise from the megaphones and from the people shouting signals and waving many flags but nobody will be throwing rocks because each night there is only one speaker from one party and all the people in the square are homogeneous in their ideology so nobody throws rocks at anybody. The ones with the contrary ideology do not come to these concentrations because if they did, there would be more people in number and everyone will think the leader who is speaking is the most demophilic.
If you and the graceful Mrs Sisskind are inclined to mix in with the people at these concentrations I assure you that here is no danger to your bodily integrity – only to your portfolios if you do not keep them buttoned in an inside pocket.
If there is a taxi strike on the morning you must leave the Grande Bretagne to go to the airport to catch the plane to Friki, I am asking my cousin Agisilaos, who is a war victim with one eye and no legs and who has an anapiric ar that circulates on odd and even days included, to accompany you from the hotel. He is a wonderful man and he will do th is with great willingness. And if there is a strike of. Olympic Airways, then he will take you to the port of Piraeus where you will embark on the Panayia Roumeliotissa which is the ship that sails on the infertile line to Friki and will arrive at three a. m. on the next morning. If the cabins on the ship are full I am asking the captain, who is the second cousin of my wife, to give you his cabin and he will sleep on the bridge. He, also, is a wonderful man and will do this with great willingness.
On election day you will be in Friki and here everything is quiet every election we are having since 1952 when there was an earthquake and nobody voted because everybody was afraid to go into the voting station and there was nobody inside anyway to control the voting.
In Friki, also, there are only 314 people who vote, 154 men and 160 women, and the men are mostly fishermen so they vote early and then go and catch fish. The women also vote early because they must do their domestic duties in the house. And if some of the ‘314 are dead since the last elections everything will be finished by 12 o’clock.
Also, Mr Sisskind, you must not be afraid that there will be upheavings after the elections because, as I say before, the Greeks are not barbaric and if there is any rape .~ nd adultery in the polls then this will be examined by the president, Mr Sartzetakis, who used to be a judge and was made a president by Mr Papandreou because he was the most upright judge in the Supreme Court. And if anybody is ‘mad and throws rocks, please be assured, Mr Sisskind, nobody will throw them at you.
In the hope that I have laid your anxieties to rest and that you will cancel the cancellation of your reservation, giving us the opportunity to hospitalize and enjoy you once more at our establishment, I remain, dear Mr Sisskind, your faithful servant,
Xenophon Kalosoridis,
Proprietor
